Monday, May 25, 2009

Oh how scared the strong are

Their pride and ignorance being a mere façade.

I'm scared. I just can't seem to meet anyone's expectations. I hear it over and over again, "Don't listen to other people, just be your best." Thank you for trying to help, really. But in all honesty, who lives like that. Everyone is always concerned with how others think of them, whether it's consciously or not. And the few people who do seem to live without that care, how do they do it? I've tried not giving a thought to what other people think, but it's impossible. My standards are the standards other people set for me. I have that fear of failure. I can't remember what it's called, let me Google it, haha. Hmm, well I'm far too lazy to double-check, but the first thing I got was "atychiphobia". Good enough. Ugh, it's just so.. pesky.

It's almost summer, time to be happy. Mr Guy Ripley put up the clarinet and harpsichord arrangement for About A Girl by The Academy Is... and it's actually really good. It's soothing, but not too boring? I like it. Listen to it at http://drop.io/guyripley. I should go, I've been lacking sleep so much lately, it's terrible. Oh, and Twitter is proving to be more addicting than I thought. Yes, I gave in to this trend. I just wonder how long it'll take to wear off.

Peacee, xox

Currently listening to: About A Girl (Clarinet & Harpsichord Version) by The Academy Is.../Guy Ripley
Namedrop of the day: Ryland Blackinton of Cobra Starship :)

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Venin venant tordre ma bouche

Il est distillé dans mon souffle.

That translates into:
Venom which breaks my mouth, it's now distilled in my breath.
(Or something like that, haha)

Ah, summer is in the air. Or it is the air. It's fine, whichever way you see it. We had the Wolverine Run today, a 20 years and going tradition I would have rather not taken part in. I suppose it was alright though, I feel I did better this time than before. Congrats to Debbie, who came in first place, which was no surprise to anyone at all :) Oh, what place did I come in? I'd much rather not speak of it. Plus, I didn't check. Let's just say it's probably very near to the end. But who cares. It's not like I was planning to be an athlete anyway. Hmm, I suppose it was just like the typical run we've been having during practises, but this time, there were people watching. Not to mention jerks throwing water, soda, and grass at us. Do they not have anything better to do with their time? Like work? From their faces, I know they aren't the students who are ahead with their courses. I sound like such a stiff, when the truth is, I'm not that much ahead of them. I should work now.

I think I'll leave it at, "I'm starting to miss winter a little."

Peacee, xox

Currently listening to: J'échoue by Alexandre Désilets
Namedrop of the day: Spongebob Squarepants, the best fry cook in all of Bikini Bottom

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Hope dangles on a string

Like slow spinning redemption.

It's the weekend and as usual, I am forced to stay home. I suppose it's not all too bad, I suppose I just have a flair for the dramatic. See what I did there? Haha, anyway, there used to be three people sleeping in my room: myself, my sister, and my younger brudduh. Yesterday, my little bro moved out and into my older brother's room, so now my sister and I have a desk and loads more space. Because you all really needed to know that, right? I dunno. I just wanted something to talk about. I don't really feel like rambling on about pointless things, so I suppose I'll leave it at an early Happy Victoria Day. I'm going to soak up some sun or learn a new song now.

Peacee, xox

Currently listening to: Vindicated by Dashboard Confessional
Namedrop of the day: Dr. Phil, just 'cause.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

There's always something in your way

What can you say? You're gonna have a good day.

There are several things I want to talk about. I guess I'll start with the ones that happened first.
The season finales of Grey's Anatomy and Ghost Whisperer. Oh my gosh. Talk about major cliff hangers. Both finales ended with you wanting more. Will Izzy and George die? Were they meeting each other in the afterworld elevator? I was hanging on to the edge of my seat and then it was over. Just wow. I could only catch half of it, because I was at a school spring concert (we were pretty good, except for the drums in one song *ahem Julian ahem*). Now, for Ghost Whisperer.. I will make it short and sweet, for if I don't... I will probably fill this whole page. But be warned, there will most definitely be spoilers.
1. Zoe dies :(
2. You can see Eli's undies when Carl the Watcher visits him. LOOOOOL.
3. Melinda's mother hires her this obsurd wedding planner.
4. Melinda's baby is going to be a BOY!
5. He will be able to do even more than Melinda can, and that obv worries her.
6. Jim/Sam and Melinda ditch the big wedding and have a renewal instead, and they have it on the street they first met. Alright, let's have it. *universal Awwww*

I suppose that's long enough. Next topic, the Meyers Briggs personality test (Meyers Briggs Type Indicator, or MBTI). My friend, Alexandra, was telling me about it and I'd already heard of it. Most of the personality tests I've seen are those predictable 10 question quizzes on Facebook, haha. The results I got were pretty accurate. I was so indecisive in answering though. I think 98% of my answers were the exact middle of Very Inaccurate to Very Accurate. That's my whole life, indecision. Well, here are the results.

I am type: INFJ - "Author". Strong drive and enjoyment to help others. Complex personality. 1.5% of total population. Talk about minority.

Possible Career Paths for the INFJ:
Clergy / Religious Work
Teachers
Medical Doctors / Dentists
Alternative Health Care Practitioners, i.e. Chiropractor, Reflexologist
Psychologists
Psychiatrists
Counselors and Social Workers
Musicians and Artists
Photographers
Child Care / Early Childhood Development

Traits:
Intuitively understands people and situations
Idealistic
Highly principled
Complex and deep
Natural leaders - I don't think so.
Sensitive and compassionate towards people
Service-oriented
Future-oriented
Value deep, authentic relationships
Reserved about expressing their true selves
Dislike dealing with details unless they enhance or promote their vision
Constantly seeking meaning and purpose in everything
Creative and visionary
Intense and tightly-wound
Can work logically and rationally - use their intuition to understand the goal and work backwards towards it


Take the test yourself.

It seems really accurate, or is it that I'm just so typical and predictable? Who knows. These 'tests' are entertaining.

I just remembered I have one more thing to talk about. Zebrahead! I just stumbled across their mash-up music videos on Youtube, and they are really good. I think their Paramore one is my favourite. Go listen to them :)

Currently listening to: Good Day by The Click Five
Namedrop of the day: Carl Jung,whose principles are the base of the Meyers Briggs Type Indicator

Monday, May 11, 2009

Sex sells

And your sex cells make all the lost boys drool.

Today was... interesting. The one day I remember about bringing extra socks for phys ed is the day I leave them on my bed. Hm. So all day, my socks were frickin' muddy and gross :( Ahh, I almost got distracted for too long again. Well nosiree! Not this time! It is currently 9:03pm and I have about an hour before my father kicks me off the computer. Anyway. Running through the forest during period one after a few nights of rain meant extra muddy muddles (mud puddles) and bye bye white socks. Yep, it was just lovely. Ah, so it's now 9:21.. I am terrible with focus. Good thing I saw the new episode of CSI Miami on the Atlantic channel early :D

Anyway, other than running, we spent periods 4 and 5 in the cafetorium learning about sex ed. Hence the title of this post. Plus I just love The Maine, haha. To be honest, I didn't learn much. Except about the STD/STI e-cards. Apparently, if you find out you have an STd/STI, you have to tell your lovers of the past 6 months. And if you find it difficult to tell them over the phone or in person, send them an e-card. One goes like this, "Roses are red, violets are blue, I gave you syphilis when we screwed at the zoo," Yeah. That really makes it easier. But the other things were just about how contraceptives don't always work and how it's tough to have a teenage pregnancy and yeah.

--- OH SHEET only 15 possible minutes left. Frig, I suck at focusing.

What else, okay Dorothy totally got me into this whole Dresden Codak thing. It's some kind of comic, but it's not just sitcoms, they're educated and make you think. OKAY IT IS NOW 10 O'CLOCK. I must flee, but do please read those comics. There's also the author's Livejournal to explain some things. Enjoy, for I must be off.

Toodles, xox

Currently listening to: The Way We Talk by The Maine
Namedrop of the day: Plato, or
Πλάτων in Greek

Friday, May 8, 2009

Chisel my heart out of stone,

I give in every time.

It feels like I haven't been on this in a while, though it's really only been a couple of days, haha. So what do you think of the new layout? I think spring has been cut short, it's gone almost directly from winter to summer, hasn't it? Anyway, I suppose much hasn't happened this week, other than art show. So I suppose I'll talk about that.

Integrated technology (basically woodshop) is part of the art show, too, so it needs security to make sure people don't steal stuff, right? And students need 5-6 hours for a quest unit, and security counts. Anyway, for an hour each day after school, I stayed in the construction lab until 4. Now, I don't really like trash talking people or saying stuff about them behind their backs, but this one chick really was something. She's self-centered, a perfectionist in that she has to win, and she acts in a way that reminds you of a spoiled 7 year old. Oh distractions, I don't feel like typing anymore, seeing as how Criminal Minds starts in about 13 minutes. Let's just say this girl got on my nerves and I couldn't wait to leave.

On a lighter note, I think a bunch of friendships that have somewhat broken loose are starting to be healed again. Sure, it'll take time, but I'm willing if they are. Even school things are seeming brighter. I guess I just needed to regain my look-at-the-bright-side attitude and just smile. It helps so much, even if you feel like a piece of pig poop. :)

Girl time, awhh yeah! Did anyone watch Spectacular? Oh my gosh, Nolan Gerard Funk was hott! Go Canada ;) And also, Colleen from The Young & The Restless was there, and Lola from Zoey 101, and that army chick from Cadet Kelly. Yep. It was a nice story, a bit typical, but most movies are. Maybe that's why we love them.

I'm going to stop myself there because Ghost Whisperer is starting right about now.

Peace! xox

Currently listening to: My Heroine by Silverstein
Namedrop of the day: Jennifer Love Hewitt

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

You are my fire,

My one desire.

Today was good. Today was great. Today was lovely. Today was uplifting.
Though I don't believe I acheived as much as I could have, I still feel quite accomplished. Maybe it was the lack of hallwalking or doing a test first thing in the morning. The test was so easy, by the way. I don't understand how people failed it. Ugh I sound vain. During period 2, I went to math. I never realized how simple y-formulas could be. Come to think of it, I'm beginning to like math again.. I'm feeling brown and nerdy! (That was an attempt to parody that Riding Dirty song, if you didn't notice, ahah). Period 3, I ran with Larissa and Joan Reed-Lutz (Ha! You owe me another one) for phys ed. I actually did a lap without breaking my pace! The trick is to breathe through your nose ahah. I think I really have improved, but alas, my flab remains. Hmm, then we had lunch outside again, it was b-e-a-utiful! (Jim Carrey reference, whaat?). The ice cream truck (one source of flab) didn't come, so I couldn't get a slushie for my throat. It still feels like something is festering in it.

Then along comes periods 4 and currently 5. I'm in the computer lab, it's nice here. I have been here only once before, struggling with TLE's. Not that they were hard, I just didn't know how they worked. Well now I do. I'm typing up my "short" story and hoping it fits in 3 pages. If anything, I think I'll just make the spacing a tad smaller. :)

And of course, dem boy tiingsz. Oh jeez, why do people type or talk like that? Doesn't it get on your nerves sometimes? Anway, I saw him a couple of times today. I was happily surprised because I thought he was going on the tech trip. If I knew he wasn't, I would have gone upstairs before TA and got another look at him ;) Oh my God. I sound so girly, it's terrible. **HOLY MOTHER OF PEARL, I accidentally pressed that pesky Back button on the mouse, and thought I lost everything, haha** Anyway, I saw him a couple of times again during the day in the halls. Probably thinking, "Wow, whattaniner,"

Anyway, time to get back to work! I have to do security for the tech part of the art show from 3-4 and then I have to pick up the DVD I put on hold from the library (they never called to say it was available!!)

Latesss, xox

Currently listening to: I Want It That Way by The Backstreet Boys
Namedrop of the day: Jim Carrey

Monday, May 4, 2009

So you're standing on a ledge,

It looks like you might fall.

I've been thinking a lot lately, though it surely hasn't been showing, but I've come to really see things in a new light. As always, I have put things to the last possible moment, like this post, for instance. Again, my dad needs it soon. Continuing on the topic of my thinking, I've just really and truly understood that life really is too short. I know that is one of the most used phrases ever, but the guest speaker at school today made me realize it for real. Today marks the beginning of Stop The Stigma Week, stigma being the barrier stopping people from getting help. My heart just poured out to the speaker, who has lost both her father and one of her brothers to suicide. She herself has attempted it when she was younger, and yet she has the strength to speak to a cafetorium full of strangers and teenagers about her ordeals. I don't know what else to say about it really, just how I found it amazing. I know I've been whining and complaining about my life, but when I really think about it, it's pretty darn great. Sure, there are a few down points, but without them, how could I ever truly appreciate the good moments?

To see light, darkness must be present. To experience true happiness, you have to know what sadness feels like, too. I like to think of it by using a candle example. If you were to light a candle and place it somewhere extremely bright, or hold it up against the sun and look at it, could you really see it's potential? No. The only way to really see how beautiful its flame is, is by seeing that flame in a pitch black room. I guess I've been rambling. Plus, my dad has 'asked' to use the computer now, except in that tone which makes it more of a statement than question. I really wish I had more time to continue this. That's procrastination for you. Like they say, keep your friends close, and your enemies closer.

Peacee, xox

Currently listening to: If I Am by Nine Days
Namedrop of the day: Franklin the turtle

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Boys will be boys

Hiding in estrogen and wearing aubergine dreams.

Okay so I didn't post anything yesterday because, well, nothing interesting happened yesterday. I woke up at 1pm, so there goes half the day. I watched a couple of cartoons with my little brudduh. I honestly cannot remember what I did for the rest of the day. Certainly not units, hah.

What happened today?
Again, not much. I just felt like posting something. A bunch of little random things happened today.
1. Ryan Sheckler was on True Jackson VP. I have to say, he looked like a bald girl. It's just that his eyes are so freaking pretty and his eyelashes are so long. I am so jealous of them.
2. I found my Jack (Skellington) earrings. At first they seemed a bit heavy, but not anymore. :)
3. I heard my mother upstairs singing some Akon song. My ears bled.

Last thing. 'Kay so my sister said that one of my 'best friends' (quotations because we aren't that close anymore) asked her if I was 'stressed' because I was behind and didn't do work at school. Uhm, first of all, I'm not that stressed anymore. I've just taken to letting the wind take me where it wishes. Secondly, how the hell would you know whether or not I do work at school? I haven't gone to class with you in what seems like ages, and you don't seem to give a damn. So do us both a favour and stop giving me wierd looks in the halls and stop asking other people about me. Or, try being friends again. I've tried and I do not want to continue being the only one having any effort.

So that last part turned out longer than I thought. Whatever. I'm gonna go write my short story now. Abby suggested I named the other world "Adanac" because it's "Canada" backwards. I think that's a much better idea than "Equalia" or "Narnia", right, Joan? Also, I bet those names are copy-righted anyway, haha.

M'kay toodles, xox

Currently listening to: Time To Dance by Panic At The Disco
Namedrop of the day:
Aliaune Damala Bouga Time Puru Nacka Lu Lu Lu Badara Akon Thiam

Friday, May 1, 2009

Hit the club up,

And yo girl is on my list.

Urgh gotta rush this, Ghost Whisperer just started and I don't wanna be on the computer late.
M'kay so during phys ed, Dorothy was singing the old Pokemon theme song to encourage me, and it was funny. That was period 3. At lunch, a couple of us (Joan, Allan, and I) went outside, and my niner crush (lmfao so girly, I have like 5 'crushes', but pft whatever) was there, and yeeah that's it :) I didn't see the guy from the post below alllllll day! Saaaaad face. but after school I went to band to sign out my instrument and one of my other 'crushes' was there and he bumped into me and said sorry. Lmfao first word to me, but not first body contact ;) LMFAO nah, it's just that in the halls, it can get quite crowded. Crushes is always in quotations because it's more of a ou-he's-nice-to-look-at thing. That's all. I must now flee to view the latest episode of Ghost Whisperer.

I fare thee well, xox

Currently listening to: Jumping (Out the Window) REMIX by Ron Browz ft. Forever the Sickest Kids
Namedrop of the day: Brendon Boyd Urie